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Pseudo Belief




There are times when you have a firm belief that you have gotten over something, and the moment is now a thing of past. Then from nowhere you see something that has the remotest of relation to the incident and the whole thing comes rushing back. Crystal clear just as if it was yesterday. You realise that all this while you were only running away from it, trying hard to get over, the belief that you were over it once and for all was a Pseudo-Belief.

You think you are over your relation. You think you hate him/her. You get yourself to believe this and actually do; well for some time. You do so to satisfy your ego. The pride of having an upper hand and the one who has the ability of "Moving On". You are now someone who's least concerned and then you try to erase the person from your memory. From your mobile, from your virtual contacts, anywhere possible. You believe now you're over him/her but you are unable to take care of that little thing called MEMORIES. The memories of the good time, the touch, the talks, the teasing.....

But you stop the contact and think you have moved on to better things in life. The only things you try and think about are the reasons why you hated him/her. The things that annoyed you, that caused you grief, the reason you got hurt, lost trust, all the reasons why the other person was wrong.

And then one day out of the blue, you get a text, an email, an IM or you see him/her online. You melt like chocolate. The memories rush in. And they all seem to be good. The past explodes and right in your face. Moments flash. You get helpless. You realise the delusion in which you were living in. Your Pseudo Belief. Most times the sad part is, that the ship of reconciliation has sailed and all your alacrity at this time is futile. Things don't get back to how they were. The clock doesn't run backwards. And you realise it's the ONLY thing that truly "moves on".

"Loving memories never die
As years roll on and days pass by
In our hearts a memory is kept
Of one we loved and will never forget."

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